[Supra Bob]

My girl and I got into a discussion tonight, and she said that she really doesn't understand my fascination with cars. BUT, she did say that if I could make her understand what it is to be a "Car guy" or "motorhead" (or whatever other term ya wanna call it)and make her understand what need of mine it fills... she would not only stop ragging me about the money I spend on my car, but she would even encourage it...She says that when I hear a car with a "performance motor", my eyes light up, I perk up, and if I had a tail, it would be wagging like a puppy about to get a biscuit...

So help me out here guys and gals... how do you explain to someone what it means to be a motor head.

 

[Tommy]

Bob,
Does she enjoy going fast in any venue?? Like on skis? Motorcycle?? Jet ski maybe?? Does she enjoy the acceleration in a plane during takeoff?? Has she ever been driving and didn't like someone tailgating on her back bumper??
:idea: Try to relate it to something that thrills her for cryin' out loud!!
Jamie <--- always liked going fast and mucho acceleration!

 

[NiGHTS]

Just say this...

Guys + Cars = Girls + Clothes

Girls can't understand why guys love cars so much and guys can't understand why girls like clothes and shopping so much...

Girls say, it's just a car?!?!

Guys say, it's just a pair of jeans?!?!

It's the same thing...in a different way...

*salutes bob*

oh whoops...never mind that...

 

[Supra Bob]

Jamie, she doesn't like going fast in ANY venue. After over a year of trying, I finally got her on the back of my bro's Quad... and if I tried to shift out of first gear, she freaked out and would try to jump off. Motorcycles.. no way. She can't ski, doesn't water ski or jet ski. Speed is not her thing at all... And anyway, its not so much the driving, its the building, installing and desiging new parts to go onto the car that shes clueless about.

NiGHTS...I do like the clothes idea... She loves shopping so maybe that will be something she gets...

 

[quick]

Just tell her that you've supported her through college and everything she's wanted to do -- now the least she can do is support you in your hobbies.

If she's going to continuously rag on you about cars when she can see that it makes you happy then ask her why she doesn't like seeing you enjoying yourself and happy.

Tell her to just be happy that you have hobbies you like. She should be supportive of that regardless.

JMO.

 

[pdupler]

Take her here once this place is open. http://www.lemaymuseum.org/
The museum is slated to be less of a car museum and more of a shrine to the popular culture created by the automobiles that are on display. Perhaps an understanding of automobile's role in our great society will convince her that its much much more than just transportation.

Phil D

 

[Junkie]

Try the lesser of several evils routine,ie., Other woman,booze,drugs,etc.

And I really like Quicks bit about happiness.My wife sees how I act when a car or Bike drives by thats tuned well.She also notices how few good looking women I notice "she points them out",as my mind is usually on cars,no matter what I'm doing She prefers I play with the cars

 

[Black Dawg]

Just tell her, "There's just something about engines that calms me down."

but no really, the clothes thing is great. I used this once to explain going to a huge swap meet- swap meet = a trip to the coolest mall you could imagine. she understood a little better.

It's hard to explain to girls that don't get it.

 

[wallcrawlr]

... how do you explain to someone what it means to be a motor head.

Just tell them to sit down and shut up. Take 'em for a drive.

 

[Supra Bob]

I tihnk I may have inadvertantly given you a bad picture of her. She does support me, but she does express concerns about the money mostly (especially as she is starting med school and we are saving to get married too). She hasn't at any point asked me to justify what I do, but I would like to be able to just to put her mind at ease. I want to be able to explain to her why I like spending hours wrenching on a car, getting dirty as hell and suffering thru bruised and bloody knuckles... so she can kind of understand it a bit better...

Phil, if that place wasn;t across the country from me, I would have her there in a heartbeat!

Shawn.. She knows I rarely drink anymore. And as far as other women, you and I are exactly on the level there. I'll be completely oblivious to a herd of naked supermodels walking down the road, but I hear a nicely tuned exhaust note, and I am all about looking to see what it is.

Sam... Already tried that, along with the "I live my life a 1/4 Mile at a time. For those 8 seconds or less, I'm free."... She slapped me and told me that just because I'm bald like Vin, doesn't mean that line will work for me.

 

[quick]

I see -- if that's the case just explain to her that it's how you relax.
She's going to med school as well? :shock: We should talk -- time for you to fly out to Sea-town.

 

[Supra Bob]

Yeah.. she starts Med school in August. She showed me her tution paperwork last time I was home.... :shocked!:

As far as flyin out to Sea-town... I've always wanted to go... If these rumors hold true and they do let me out of the Corp in August... I'm thinking thats definately a good possibility.

As for telling her its how I relax... I tried that..but thats not all of it... I tihnk part of the problem is I am trying to explain something that I can't figure out myself.

 

[WadeT]

She will never understand so save your self alot of headaches and just get rid of her. :lol:

Trust me. I've been down this road before... :crazyeye:

 

[quick]

I'm not going to get into personal shit here, but suffice it to say that school can be stressful as hell on a relationship. Do whatever you can do to keep things sync'ed up.

 

[Supra Bob]

Chris... I think we are on the same wavelength here...

 

[dohc82]

Try getting a copy of GT2 get her a memory card and play the game...let her buy her own cars(with help at first) and help her mod them. Gradually she will understand the appeal of it. How the parts affect the performance like the human body(med school right). This helped my wife to understand (except for the med school part) and she has quite the car collection now. Best of all she understands the appeal and understands when I talk about mods and upgrades. And be patient. My wife even tolerates a little drag racing now and then. And she hasdeveloped a great instinct for grabing the "yahoo handle" It just takes some time.
-Wil

 

[dogstar]

not to be a snot, but good god am i glad my gf totally supports me and wants to help work on cars.

she even wants a supra

as far as your problem bob, im betting that she was always an 'indoor girl' when she was younger, very feminine, played clean games, didnt go play in the mud or help dad work in the garage.

im betting that you were the kinda guy who was always mucking about fixing something or taking it apart or helping pops fix a lawnmower or something.

explain to her that youve been doing stuff like this for a long time, that it validates your need to create by allowing you to make and improve things.
relate it to her schooling, how mechanics helps you improve your world, like medicine will help her improve the world.

hope to help

 

[Supra Bob]

Wil...thats actually a pretty good idea. I'll give that a go.

Barry,

With me, your dead on. I was playing with a cutting torch and a socket set when my friends had G.I. Joe's. As far as her, she was actually also something of a Tom Boy... tho as she grew, she turned more towards sports... She's also very creative... so I think she may understand the creativity side of it.

Her and I have a "Date" on Friday night coming up and I hope to be able to make her understand some of this. To everyone who has piped in already, I thank you all. If ya haven't and still wanna, please do.

 

[SupraFiend]

Bob, although this is a somewhat expensive and time consuming way to go about it, the best way I found to make my wife understand my passion, was to get her hooked on it too. I bought her a 1986 corolla GTS, restored it for her, and she loves it. She washes it every weekend now, cleans it in and out, its always spotless inside, she does basic maintenace on it, likes to go with me to the wrecker so she can replace various interior bits to make it perfect, and takes it auto crossing on weekends! The last 5 years or so have been a little rocky as I get a lot of flak for spending almost all of my weekends wrenching on my cars. I know I need to spend more time with her doing other things, and I do now, but I don't get nearly as much flak when I'm out there working on the cars as I used to. Partially because shes often out there working on hers too or I'm doing stuff to her car, but I think she understands more why I enjoy this stuff so much. Shes usually pretty supportive of me buying parts that I really want and or need, and now shes usually bugging me to get stuff for her car too ("Honey, I really want an lsd"), which can get expensive of course, so you need some of your own restraint (luckily the scotish and irish cheap bastard in me is alive and well). This won't neccesarly work for all ladies, as she was a bit of tom boy herself when she was young (father is a fellow gearhead and only had daughters :wink and shes always liked cars, but now she's begining to understand what it really means to be "into cars".

 

[Crocket]

re: girlfriend and car

Hi Bob,

I was gonna say that if it makes you happy, and keeps you outta trouble most gfs should respect and encourage that. I then asked my gf for her opinion, and she said that maybe if your gf got more involved with helping you out working on the car etc..... that she could grow an appreciation, maybe even a liking for the hobby. And to tell you the truth this makes sense. When I first started dating my gf, I was spending A LOT of time on my cars, and she started to have certain issues and reservations about me spending so much time on the car and not her. But when I got her involved in what I was doing, the complaining stoped and she started to enjoy a different aspect of cars she had never thought she would of liked. I first got her doing easy tasks, like helping me change the oil, air filter, spark plugs etc.... Then when she got good and a little experienced she started taking over complete tasks like ripping out the A/C in my parts car and my Celica etc.... It was cool, she actually got interesting in it, and started asking me lots of questions about how things worked etc..... I think as long as she was spending time with me, she was happy. Maybe this is an option that could work for you too? Good luck, talk to you later

edit: Wow, looks like I'm not alone. After reading some of the other posts, seems like having ones gf help them work on the car is an effective and relationship expanding passtime. Wrench on!
Sonny